Zander loves his Guac!

Lastnight I was tired and didn't feel like cooking so we went out to a Mexican Restaurant by our house. Zander has always loved Guacamole and when we go there I always order him his own side of it to eat. As usually he dipped chips and grabbed fistful to shove in his mouth. There are large chunks of tomato and onion in it, which he also loves. There was a couple sitting behind us and just could not believe how he was going to town on the Guac, so I decided to video it.

Halloween 2010

This year Zander was the World's Cutest Gnome for Halloween! He was sick this weekend with Roseola so I thought for sure he wouldn't be up to trick or treating. Boy was I wrong. We went to a few neighbors houses that we know and he wanted to walk the entire block shouting "treat, treat, treat peas!" Finally, we wrangled him up and threw him in the car so we could show him off to some close friends and family. Each time we had to put him back in the car he was so upset because he saw other kids walking around. The only way to console him was through M&M's in his carseat cupholder! As you can imagine, he slept horrible that night...too much sugar but, we all definitely had a blast.

Ione Train Ride

On Sunday we took Zander on a historical train ride through Northern WA. We all had a blast looking at the beautiful scenery, eating kettle corn, and just being together for some good family bonding time. Zander did way better than I had anticipated. I packed a backpack full of food, books, and toys in case we needed them but all he wanted to do was look out the window and talk to the people next to us in the train. I love my little bear, as long as people are around to socialize with, he's always happy.

Tubby Time

Tyler and I had the pleasure of seeing what it life is like with two kids the other night. Baby Z and Breslin have been friends for a long time and they play so well together, we all had a blast. They were chasing eachother around the house at one point during the evening but I missed videoing it. Tyler and I really want to have another baby and realized the other night that we could definitely handle more. No, I'm not pregnant yet but Zander will for sure get a sibling in the future.
Check out my poor pasty white child next to this tan boy.

My Dancing King

My son loves music and loves to DANCE. Everywhere we go and he hears music, no matter what kind, he begins to bust it out. On the Disney channel in the morning he loves the dancing robot and he always tries to learn the new move. He has begun to incorporate all the moves that he has learned over time. I love this kid. Check out his cuteness!

P.S. Happy 3 year anniversary Tyler. I love you so much. Thank you for your sperm to make this beautiful boy!

How did I get a Ginger Boy?

Yesterday Tyler and I took Zander in for pictures. He has begun to have some stranger danger issues lately and clung to me for most of the photo shooting session. However,I think that the photographer did a pretty good job photo-shopping me out of the pics. Here are some of my favorites!
The place where we went for pictures have photos of Zander that they use in their books, and Tyler and I were noticing how significantly lighter his hair has gotten over the last 6 months. After looking at the book,Tyler and I looked at eachother and asked "How did we get such a Ginger child?" I guess those recessive genes are just going wild with Zander.

He's one!

HE'S ONE, I cannot believe we made it. Today is a very special day for another reason, one of my very best friends just sent me a text saying she was going into labor this morning. Congratulations Betty and Brian, I hope Parker and Zander share a birthday:) Here are a couple of pictures from this past weekend. We took him for his second haircut. What a handsome little love.

Where does the time go...

Today was the first time that my little guy rode in his car seat facing the right way. The entire way to daycare I could see his smiling face in my rearview mirror and I loved every minute of it. I could see him so facinated with the road, my changing the radio stations, and my singing in the car.

I remember when I brought him home from the hospital and I was so afraid of breaking him. I stressed over every little wimper and cry and could not wait until he was big enough to sit up and crawl. There are sometimes now with how busy he is and how he won't let me snuggle him (unless completely exhausted) that I miss my little baby who slept all the time nestled on my shoulder.

I cannot believe how quickly this year has gone by. In just 2.5 weeks my child will be one year old. My sister asks me all the time if I can remember what life was like before Zander, yes of course I can, it was much easier, but not as sweet or rewarding. He is the best.

P.S. Don't mind his crazy Einstein hair in the first picture! He had just gotten up and we were in a hurry!

Sick...sick...sick

Things have been pretty crappy around my house and I mean that literally. Today is the first day that we are all feeling good. Last Friday morning around 2:30 am, I awoke to my child puking all over the place. From that moment on things just continued to get worse. Zander had the stomach flu and lovingly passed it along to all of us. I was sicker than a dog on Saturday and Tyler came down with it on Sunday. Zander still has a touch of the runs today and is still rejecting most solid foods but I totally understand what he is going through.

Meanwhile we are planning for his first birthday bash. Tyler and I bought him his presents this weekend. I'm so excited.

Here is one of my favorite pictures of him.

99 Things

Stolen From Sniffer's Blog (AKA Sarah Cook)



I stole this from Sniffer, it looked like fun. You're suppose to bold the things you've done.



1. Started a blog.

2. Slept under the stars.

3. Played in a band. (Does Rock Band count...Pennywheelie Forever!)

4. Visited Hawaii.

5. Watched a meteor shower.

6. Given more than you can afford to charity.

7. Been to Disneyland.

8. Climbed a mountain.

9. Held a praying mantis.

10. Sang a solo (3rd grade talent show, Whitney Houston, The Greatest Love of All)

11. Bungee Jumped.

12. Visited paris

13. Watched a lightening storm.

14. Taught yourself an art from scratch.

15. Adopted a child.

16. Had food poisening.

17. Walked to the top of the statue of liberty.

18. Grown your own vegetables.

19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.

20. Slept on an overnight train.

21. Hitchhiked.

22. Had a pillow fight.

23. Taken a sick day when you weren't really sick.

24. Built a snow fort.

25. Held a lamb.

26. Gone skinny dipping.

27. Run a marathon.

28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice. Just in Vegas at the Venetian.

29. Seen a total eclipse.

30. Watched a sunset or a sunrise.

31. Hit a home run

32. Been on a cruise.

33. Seen Niagara falls in person.

34. Seen the birthplace of your ancestors.

35. Been to amish country.

36. Taught yourself a new language.

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied.

38. Seen the leaning tower of pisa in person.

39. Gone rock climbing.

40. Seen Michelango's David

41. Sung Karaoke

42. Seen Old Faithful Geyser erupt.

43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.

44. visited Africa

45. Walked on a beach at midnight.

46. Been transported in an ambulance.

47. Had your portrait painted.

48. Gone deep sea fishing.

49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person.

50. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling.

51. kissed in the rain

52. Played in the mud.

53. Gone to a drive in theatre.

54. Been in a movie. (College, Jon Flesher, and home videos!)

55. been to the top of the Eifel Tower.

56. visited the great wall of china.

57. Started a business

58. Taken a martial arts class.

59. visisted Russia.

60. Served in a soup kitchen.

61. Sold girl scout cookies.

62. Gone whale watching.

63. Got flowers for no reason.

64. Donated blood, platelets, or plasma.

65. Gone ski diving.

66. Visited a nazi concentration camp.

67. Bounced a check.

68. Flown in a helicopter.

69. Saved a favorited childhood toy.

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.

71. Eaten cavier

72. Pieced a quilt.

73. Stood in Times Square.

74. Toured the Everglades.

75. Been fired from a job.

76. Seen the changing of the guards in london.

77. Broken a bone. Pinky toe kicking JJ and Geoff.

78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle.

79. Seen the Grand Canyon.

80. Published a book.

81. Visited the Vatican.

82. Bought a brand new car.

83. Walked in Jerusalem.

84. Had your picture in the paper.

85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on new years eve. (Mazatlan 2004)

86. Visited the White House.

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. (Does fishing count)

88. Had chicken pox.

89. Saved someone's life.

90. Sat on jury duty.

91. Met someone famous.

92. Joined a book club

93. Got a tatoo

94. Had a baby

95. Seen the Alamo in person.

96. Swam in the great salt lake.

97. Been involved in a law suit.

98. Owned a cell phone.

99. Been stung by a bee.

Waterboy

On Saturday Tyler and Zander went to Baby swim class. Zander had a blast! He loves water, whenever it's bath time, he kicks his feet like crazy as he is getting into the tub. He did the same as they were getting into the pool. In water babies class they sing songs, play with toys, blow bubbles, and practice jumping into the pool. It is awesome.
After class, Zander was so quiet, Tyler and I were worried something was wrong with him. Then on the way home he fell asleep. Tyler pulled him out of his carseat and he stayed asleep (which has never happened), handed him to me and I put him in his crib, all the while staying asleep. He continued to sleep for the next 2 hours. Tyler enjoyed quiet time so much that he asked me how often during the week we can take him to swim class.
Here are some pictures from the class.

8 Month Photos

Yesterday Tyler and I took Zander in for some photos. He is just 8 months old and he has changed so much so we thought it was time to go again. Typically, he's a ham but this time he was not in the mood. I felt so bad for the ladies trying to make him laugh because he just kept crying and screaming. I wanted to do some nude shots but he for sure was not having that. The pictures turned out cute anyway.
I love the spikey hair ones. He has so much and such long hair that Tyler and I go back and forth on cutting it. I really want to hold out until after his first birthday. For now I'm going to give him the spike and the fo hawk when I can.
Enjoy!

This Thanksgiving, I'm Thankful for Jennie

My favorite person, Jennie, Zander's daycare provider is more brave than I. Yesterday when I got home I was reviewing the notebook where Jennie logs their day together and at 9am it said "Painted" 9:30 am "Bath". I thought hmmm, that is wierd. I asked Tyler and we both were so confused, really, she painted. That is something I would never have attempted with a six month old. We both went about our evening, however still perplexed with the idea that at some point during their day together they painted. I went to bed and wanted to call her to ask her about it but I thought, I will see her in the morning so I'll just wait.

I got up this morning, got ready and went to eat breakfast when I found it. The most beautiful picture that I've ever seen in my life, hanging right smack in the middle of my fridge. OH MY GOD, I yelled, and then I started crying. My boy painted his first picture. Then I felt like a complete shmuck since I missed it hanging their all evening long. I called Tyler and told him and he said "Man we are jerks!"

Jennie arrived as I was feeding my boy his favorite new breakfast (Pureed bananas) and I thanked her for the picture. I told her how I started to cry and she said "Well don't open your birthday present then." She had taken his hand and foot prints and pictures of him painting and framed them for me. Of course I cried, it was so amazing and thoughtful. I love her and feel so blessed that my son spends his day with someone so giving. She is providing him the learning opportunities that I love when I can't.

I still can't believe she braved fingerpainting with him. When I asked her how it went she said it was so easy. She explained that she taped the paper to his high chair and let him go to town. Again, she is more brave than me.

Homemade Baby Food

This weekend I spent most of Sunday making homemade baby food for my little Zander Bear. I made squash, sweet potatoe, and carrot. Currently, sweet potatoe is his favorite but he will eat the others. I loved doing it, it was so easy and it made me feel very Martha Stewart like. I steamed the carrot and sweet potatoe and cooked the squash and then I just pureed each in my blender. Voila...fabulous baby food. This weekend I'm going to do some more and I can't wait. Here is a picture of my little bear getting ready to go out in his first snow!

H1N1 and my little boy

On Monday was Zander's 6 month well child exam. I knew he would be getting his usual round of vaccines, which he typical has no problem with. I was curious about the H1N1 vaccine because he is in daycare at my work and he is exposed to so much crap. The doctor told me it was totally safe (being that it is thermerasol free) and that he would definitely recommend it for Zander given his above situation 3 days a week. We decided to do it while we were there even though I felt a little apprehensive.

We went home and he was acting like his typical self, slept more but other than that did not seem bothered. We spent our day like usually, eat, sleep, play, and poop. I put him to bed around 7:30 and thought we were in the clear. Then around 8pm he woke up screaming, his little cheeks were bright red and his entire body was so hot. I checked his temperature and it was 101.6. I called the consulting nurse and she told me to give him Tylenol. I went to bed with him because I just wanted to cuddle and hold my little baby. I was so worried about him. I kept thinking "OH my gosh, this is all my fault." Around midnight I felt his fever break, I was so happy. The next morning he woke up with a slight fever around which steadily climb to 101.6 again, I gave him another dose, broke his fever and he has been happy ever since.

It scared me so bad. I was worried that my decision to have him vaccinated hurt him more than helped him.

This morning he is happy and fever free. Thank goodness!

To Breastfeed or To Bottle Feed Part Two

After a week of trying to breastfeed and no luck, Tyler and I were off to our first lactation consultation. We met the nurses and lactation specialist who were there to "help" us and who seemed nice enough. We headed into the room where they promptly asked me to remove my shirt, handed me a breastfriend pillow (they explained that the boppy is crap for nursing), and grabbed my week old baby and stripped him naked. Zander became pissed and I tensed up. They were throwing so much information at us and shoving my screaming baby into all of these different positions that I began to feel like I made a mistake coming. The lactation lady asked Tyler to take pictures so we could remember how to do it at home. Then she asked us to show her how to do what they showed us. Every question I had was answered with an extremely condescending tone, and at one point she even yelled at me when I was trying to do what they showed us. She said "How can he eat like that!!!" I started crying from exhaustion and pure embarrassment (I was there for help, hello). She said "Oh god, don't tell me you're crying because the baby is crying." First of all who cares if I was, I was a first time mom, instead I yelled back "I'm crying because you're yelling at ME and I'm trying to learn." I wanted to add "You Ugly Witch!)
After that, Tyler grabbed his screaming baby and gave me a big hug, looked at the lady and said "Let's go." She looked so embarrassed and apologized. From that moment on she was more human. We began trying again, this time however they added a supplemental nursing system, most often known as the SNS. This is a tiny tube that they attach to your nipple that you wear around your neck, that gives the baby some formula while stimulating your milk production. Zander latched beautifully with this attached and we were thrilled. We began to see a silver lining.
The lactation specialist was excited to see that this was working too, however expressed that she would like more of a jump start to my milk production and had us rent a hospital grade pump, recommended some herbs, and had us buy the breastfriend pillow. The pump came in a giant green container, we called it the "BEAST." We were put on a strict regimen of offering my breast with the SNS, then supplementing with the bottle, via Tyler, and then pumping each boob for 10 minutes while I watched Tyler feed my baby. She wanted me to do this atleast 8 times a day. Now remember Zander was so new so he would eat every 1.5 to 2 hours. This entire process was taking atleast a half hour.
I wanted to breastfeed so badly that I became obsessed with this process. I was so strict with the regimen, that on mother's day, I did'nt get out of my rocking chair except to pee. There was one problem that Tyler and I were noticing, each time I tried to pump, there was never any milk...none...dry as a bone. I trudged on because I kept thinking everyone's milk comes in eventually, it has to.
Three, four, five days went by and nothing, not one drop of milk when pumping. My nipples were cracking, peeling, bleeding but I kept doing it. Finally, I lost my mind and just started crying and I couldn't stop. Tyler was getting to hold my newborn baby all the time and bond with him during bottle time, and All I was able to do was torture him with work. They would sit there all cozied up together, Tyler would sing and Zander was happy. I was jealous and realized that I couldn't take it anymore. I was suppose to be able to nourish my baby, bond and snuggle. I was a wreck, I called my mom and my sister and they both told me to stop it, to give him the bottle and be ok with it.
I felt so defeated, I wanted to nurse but I couldn't. I felt like I was letting my baby down and my husband. I wanted to provide what I knew would be the best food for Zander and I knew how important that was to Tyler. But I also knew that I could no longer do what I was doing. Finally after some real soul searching and talking with Tyler, who by the way was 100% behind me on whatever, we both decided our baby was to be bottle fed.
After we decided it felt so good to have a definitive answer. I felt free, we returned the green beast (mostly because I didn't want to look at it again) bought some bottles, Tyler researched what would be the best formula for our boy, and we were on our way. Since then, except for writing this, I haven't looked back.
My mother arrived the next week to spend a week babying us and she was so happy to see me looking comfortable and happy. She admitted that she was worried about me because of our previous conversations. One day when she was here I started to explain to her exactly what I had been through and showed her what were were doing and we both began to laugh hysterically. She said "Oh my god Tammy, no wonder you were miserable." At that moment, laughing about it, I felt healed. I'll never forget it (I'm actually tearing up right now remembering it).
Zander is thriving, growing, happy, and healthy. He is a gift to Tyler and I. The big bad container of formula is our friend not our enemy. We love our bottles so much, he kicks his legs when he sees it coming. What I've learned from my experience is 1) Lactation women are self righteous bitches, 2) to give myself a break and remember as long as I'm trying to be the best mom I can, then I am being the BEST mom to Zander and 3) to never judge someone else's decisions about mothering because you never know what they have been threw in their life.

To Breastfeed or to Bottle feed...Part One

When I was pregnant with my little bundle of joy, I thought for sure that I would breastfeed. I bought a nursing cover, nursing pads, nursing bras, and a pump. I envisioned myself holding my little love in my arms and nourishing him with what has been instilled in me as the best possible food for him. I'm a speech therapist to boot so of course I knew the benefits of this motherly nectar.
And then Zander was born and there was no milk. Our time in the hospital flew by and everyone kept sharing their stories of how long it took for their milk to come in. Most of my friends and family kept telling me to watch and see "you'll feel your boobs get really big and heavy." I felt completely comfortable that this was a natural process and that any day my milk would come in. Just to be on the safe side and receive any free information that I can, I asked the nurse for a lactation consult, which is when they explained that if I really wanted to nurse that I needed to keep trying and by no means ever, give him formula.
We went home and a day went by, no milk, two days...no milk, three days...no milk, I was starting to freak out. My little boy was freaking out too. My sister in law, came over to help me out the day after I got home and she realized that my little boy was starving and went and bought him some formula. She explained that it would just help to supplement while I was waiting for my milk to come in. I was so scared to give it to him after everyone was telling me not to. I gave him 1 ounce and I have never seen a happier baby. He sucked it down so fast and prompltly went to sleep. I started crying because I thought I had hurt my baby. I didn't understand why he wasn't crying anymore. I thought I had poisened him. My sister in law, said relax he's fat and happy right now. I decided that this was a one time thing and that I was going to stay on track with pushing the nursing.
In one day he was back to crying all the time, by the second day he was not latching, and by the third day he only had 2 wet diapers. I called the doctor and told them what was going on, they explained that I needed to keep trying to nurse, and again "DO NOT GIVE HIM FORMULA."
Everyone tried to help. My mother had people from her work calling me with ideas, like having a beer to relax (everyone kept telling me I was too anxious for my milk to come in) warm compresses, and herbal teas. All the while my boobs never felt full or seemed to get any bigger.
I kept calling and asking nurses and doctors and friends and family, "can I just give him some formula, I really don't think he's getting anything?" People kept telling me "no, your milk will never come in then." All I heard was keep trying, keep trying.
I remember one extremely difficult night. Zander was done latching and just pissed at me for not feeding him. I kept trying to nurse and he would clamp down with his little gums so hard and start screaming. We tried for 2 hours and I was crying, he was screaming. I called the hospital at like 2 am and I was screaming into the phone, Zander was crying in the background, and I finally found a nurse with sympathy. She said "mam, give your child some formula and go to bed." I couldn't believe this, I thought, this has to be a joke. I asked her if she was sure and explained how I had been told that he wouldn't nurse if I did that. She said "No, give him food, it's been a week hon' it might never come in."
I hung up the phone and pondered the thought, "No milk? what? she had to be crazy." I told Tyler what she said and he ran into the kitchen and made a bottle. My baby ate 1.5 ounces and fell to sleep so happy. In the morning I began trying to latch for 5 minutes each breast, and then giving him a bottle. I also decided at that point to make another lactation appointment because I still really wanted to breastfeed.
To Be Continued...

My big eater

My boy eats. He has begun eating rice cereal and he loves it. In the past two weeks we have tried 3 different kinds and found that the Gerber Organic Brown Rice suits him the best. When ever I put him in his high chair he gets super excited. I've videotaped it and will post as soon as Tyler shows me how. (I'm computer iliterate)

He also has two wonderful beautiful teeth. They are so cute. He loves to chew on anything he can get his hands on. The other night we were lying on the bed with Gunther and Tank watching TV and Zander reached up over his head and tried to put Gunther's foot in his mouth. Gunther just layed there and looked at him like he was crazy and I had to pull his foot out of the death grip that Zander had on it.

I was looking at him today as my co-worker was bouncing him on her knee during lunch and thinking "Gosh I cannot believe how big he is!"

Zander's Baby Talk

I've kept my baby alive for 3 months!!!!!!!!

I cannot believe it but, I've been a mother for 3 whole months! In just a short amount of time Zander and I have survived circumsicion, a belly button infection, a yeast infection, our first round of vaccines, trying to figure out breast versus bottle, and just the everyday ins and outs of a newborn. In just three months Tyler and I have learned what each cry means and exactly how to react to them, whether its I'm hungry, I'm tired, or I'm bored. Yes, my son has an I'm bored cry. When he is not wet or poopy, not tired, and not hungry, then he is bored and just would like someone to talk, sing, or read to him. It's pretty funny. The other day he was playing in his minigym laughing and squealing. I sat down and started to watch a show that I had been waiting to catch up on. I noticed that he was staring at me. I talked to him and told him what I was doing and proceeded to relax and enjoy myself. Then all the sudden he started screaming. I picked him up and tried to feed him, nope, he spit it out, then I smelled his butt, nope no poop, hmm I thought so I began singing and walking around and he started cooing and smiling. I layed him down on my bed and we had the best 30 minute conversation ever.

What I've learned about my baby boy... He loves to sing, talk, and laugh. He thinks that daddy is funny when he dances and loves to flirt with the girls at my work, actually any woman in general. At work, I bring him into the lunch room to see the girls. He'll sit there and flirt for the whole hour and promptly fall asleep when back in his nursery. He doesn't like to go longer then 2 hours without a meal. He poops every morning at 6 am and then likes to suck on his fist for 30 minutes in preparation for his morning bottle. He loves a bath and would kick and punch the water for hours. He screams when I get him out. He also loves his swaddle wrap. I'm dreading the day we give that up. As soon as I swaddle him he passes out. He does this sweet little whisper and takes these deep breathes of my chest until he falls asleep. I love it. I love that my scent is soothing to him!
Oh yeah and p.s. he loves his bear that makes womb sounds in his co-sleeper and in his crib at work. I turn those sounds on and he is out like a light.

My sister in law was over for a wedding a couple of weeks ago and we were talking about babies and kids. We were talking about how for the first 3 months with a baby you feel like you are in "survival" mode and how proud you feel that your baby has been kept alive for a month, two months, or even three:) Hence, the name of the post.


Here are some recent photos.



This is my nephew Apollo. He is sweet as pie!
Here is a picture of the boy cousins. We thought we would try and get Apollo to "hold" the baby.
Aren't they cute!!

Man, I love this one of Apollo.
Zander looking cool
Sleeping in his bed during nap time:)

Cuddled up with daddy!
Gunther is not interested in the baby but he sure loves his toys.


Some how last month Tyler convinced me to go camping. He promised that he would do everything and that I just had to relax with the baby. I was so stressed out because it was so hot but it ended up being awesome. Tyler did take care of everything and the baby was fine, we hung out in the shade in the hammock, took a walk to the lake and how an awesome campfire. Since we had such a great time we are going to go camping again at then end of August.

Tummy time, he hates this and usually screams his head off.

This is my favorite picture. I blew this one up. He looks like he is ready to kick ass and take names:)